Things Kelly Is Not Allowed to Say on Facebook

-Dude, if you want to live in a theocracy, I’m sure Iran is lovely this time of year.

-SHUT UP ABOUT YOUR CASTLE, AND YOUR FARM, AND YOUR SIMS. I can’t find my important cartoons and kitty pictures in all this crap.

-So, you’re upset because you might have to pay for a fat junkfood-eater’s health care, but not at all worried that they’ll pay for yours, because flying planes in Alaska isn’t a hazardous job *at all.* And skiing and snowboarding, totally safe and healthy hobbies. Running from the cops on your motorcycle, also a totally healthy and wise decision. We can tell you make good decisions because you’re thin, really.

-[RANDOM STREAM OF PROFANITY]

-Yes, you can totally marry a tree, provided that I get to uproot the tree and beat you with it for making such stupid arguments on my posts. SSM != marrying a plant.

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